How often have you been your angry, hurt or immature self? Do you remember doing something that in your right mind you’d never think of doing like yelling at someone when they’ve not done their job or getting really emotional when your partner has forgotten to consider you in her plans? This happens when a part of you has taken over. It speaks on your behalf.
What it really needs is for you to notice it, really hear it, and give importance to its needs. Then if you need to speak to someone on behalf of a part of you, the communication will probably be much more wholesome and effective. It will feel also different inside. You’ll be coming from a more ‘in charge’ place.
There is a presence within me (and you) that’s bigger than the places that are hurting, needy and even acting out.
I’ve learned how to access that presence within me. After a whole lot of practice, I can tune in to this presence even when I’m upset, when a part of me seems to be taking over, when it seems like it’s all of me that’s angry or hurt or overwhelmed. Awareness of this presence in me helps me BE WITH my self, sense what a painful sensation is all about, or listen to my tender and needy places. It enables me to hear, honor and give space to these places in me so they can transform in the way they need to in order for me to move forward.
Often sarcasm, slips of the tongue, miscommunication, emotional outbursts and such are indications of something within us that needs our loving presence with them. Attending to our own needs and desires keeps them from speaking on our behalf, or leaking into our interactions with others.
Do take a moment to PAUSE and reflect.
Have you recently wished you felt more in charge of yourself: your life, your emotions and actions? Maybe you heard yourself say something that brought to your attention how sad or mad or happy you were feeling, something you didn’t realize earlier?
Perhaps you’d like to connect with that quiet place in you, an integral part of you, yet detached from all the drama in and around you.
Here’s a brief exercise that runs about 10 minutes that you can use to tune in to yourself when you’ve made some time.
Listen to the Recording: Grounding Exercise